Crash Curb: “Rick Perry FTW”. Oh, haha, don’t... →
cashcrab: “Rick Perry FTW”. Oh, haha, don’t worry, that was just a joke. You might not have been able to tell because my sense of humor tends to be rather tongue-in-cheek. And believe me, that’s not the only part of my life that’s “tongue-in-cheek” - I have a girlfriend. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge! Or, well,…
it's official im gonna kil myself →
it-withers-and-withers: Have you gone to that vegan bakery? It’s awful. They have these breakfast cupcakes, and I swear it tasted like sand. I was like, “Excuse me, this is very sandy.” And I asked, “What do you put in it?” and you know what they said to me? “Sand.”
A game like Mad Gab, only I just make noises and...
brandnewswastikas: A real man gets a prenuptial agreement before he gets married because he’s poor and wants to take half of her money. I don’t know how prenuptial agreements work so I don’t know if what I just said makes sense.
cashcrab: Going into a store and giving someone money to draw your own name somewhere on your own skin with ink and a drill
Victoria Jackson was literally the worst SNL cast...
dongcity: fucking idiot
(V) (;,,;) (V)
cashcrab: A letterman jacket that says “5-Hour Energy” across the back of it in college font